The Chronic Consumer

I freely admit that I make a lot of purchases simply for the sake of nostalgia. This started happening especially frequently after my son was born, because I was suddenly going to toy stores more often than ever. Whenever I saw a toy that I had as a child, or, more likely, that I wanted but never received, I would end up buying it for my boy. That urge hasn’t let up, even though it’s been almost six years already.

My latest nostalgia-fueled purchase was the Mattel Classic Football 2 handheld game. This is something that I did have as a kid, and I remember spending hours playing this thing. Of course, the Mattel football game came out way, way before Nintendo DS and PlayStation Portable, so even though it’s simplistic by today’s standards, it was the bomb 25 years ago!

Anyway, Mattel Classic Football 2 is a remake of the original that came out in 1978 or 1979. The “men” are simple red LCD lines that move up and down the field via four directional buttons. Gameplay is equally simple, as you have only “men” on your team, the QB and a receiver. You can either run, pass, or kick on each play, with the object being to try to slip past the six defenders that oppose you. The defenders are controlled by the computer and move randomly, so most of the time, you’re just waiting for a passing or running lane to open up.

Just like in real football, you can get a first down after 10 yards to keep your drive alive. You can also hit the “Kick” button on fourth down, which will result in either a punt or a field goal attempt (the computer determines which kick is called for), or you can score a touchdown, which counts as 7 points.

There’s a kickoff to start the game, and one after each score. But unlike the original version, there’s no kickoff to start the third quarter. In fact, when time runs out in the second quarter, you just continue with the same drive, which is sorta strange.

The game is for one or two players, but even in one player mode, there’s no computer team. The computer is always on defense, and a human always needs to control the offense, so in a one player game, you essentially have to play both sides.

And finally, there are two difficulty levels, Pro 1 and Pro 2, with two additional “Easter egg” difficulty levels of Pro 3 and Pro 4, obtained by holding down the “Kick” button as you turn the game on.

Overall, Mattel Classic Football 2 is still fun to play on occasion. I keep it in my desk drawer and pull it out for a few minutes whenever I need a break from work. It’s not a game that’s likely to keep today’s kids occupied for very long, but it’s a nice throwback for Gen X’ers like myself.